Christian Matchmaking?

I am a Christian matchmaker. I don’t only serve Christians, but I AM a Christian.

My goal is to match people who are good-hearted - those who are kind, thoughtful, and considerate. Those who exercise humility, self-reflection, and the courage to stand up to the rest of the world.

It has been my personal experience that I can find more people who are genuinely trying live this way in the Christian community. But I am absolutely aware that beautiful souls can be found in many different religions. I also strive to be respectful of negative experiences that people may have had with Christians, or at Christian churches.

I welcome all sincere clients who seek to meet matches with serious dating and marriage in mind. The issue is not whether I’m okay with you, the non-Christian client. The issue is whether you’re okay with me, the Christian matchmaker.

What does it mean to have a Christian matchmaker?

Firstly, it means I’m going to be praying for you. I will be praying that any hurts or disappointments you’ve experienced so far be fully healed, so that you can enter into a new relationship with an uplifted spirit. I will be praying that God allows me to be helpful in your search for your partner. I will pray for discernment and that I will be humble and pay attention to the client’s needs, not just rush forward with my own opinions. I will pray that you can be positive and hopeful, so that your matches see you in your best possible light.

Secondly, it means that I’ll be looking for the partner that will best suit you in an overall healthy manner. Your personal health is reflected in your relationships. Some of the biggest challenges in today’s society are workaholism, excessive self-medication, poor diet and nutrition, lack of sleep, and tolerating abuse from family, friends, or workplaces. I advocate for making the hard changes to self and environment that are required to get you into a healthy state of body, mind, and spirit.

What does that mean in terms of finding your ideal partner?

It means that if your weakness is allowing partners to take advantage of you, I’m not going to match you with someone who is manipulative or self-centered - regardless of how physically attractive or wealthy that person may be. If your weakness is workaholism, I’m not going to match you with a fellow unrepentant workaholic. I’m going to look for someone who values balance and is assertive/compelling enough to motivate you to bring more balance into your life.

Thirdly, having a Christian as a matchmaker means that I am constantly going to be encouraging you to set ego aside and view situations from a position of acceptance. I believe in potential requiring a catalyst to convert into realization. Do we expect perfection from the person sitting across from us? Or do we acknowledge our own imperfections and give others the grace of acceptance? If your date’s appearance isn’t selfie-ready, or his laugh is overly loud; if she seems nervous, or overshares - how beautiful would it be if you pretended you didn’t notice, and focused on getting to know their positive attributes instead?

If everyone did this on dates, we’d all have a bunch of singles to introduce to each other. Instead of a date being a waste of energy and time for two people, it would be an information-gathering expedition that could yield fruit for others on your team. (Bumble is starting to introduce this feature, although it is far from perfect!)

Our modern paradigm makes life harder than it has to be. I’m 100% for facing challenges and breaking barriers. But I’m not the type that glories in warping Nature. My style of Christian matchmaking is about approaching ourselves and the people in our lives holistically, from a position of grace. This might sound romantic, but ultimately, it’s a battle! It’s a battle to keep yourself from wanting, believing, and demanding the impossible from yourself and others. It’s a battle to break out of the habit of being discontent, and making choices that perpetuate that cycle of discontent. We want relationships because we want to be happier, and my focus is often on whether you are prepared to embrace that happiness.